Where's Amelia?

OOOOOOh I have been... I dunno, just being...

Getting settled into my life... trying to fill the time..

Now that I'm single I have twice as much work to do.. I'm busy. At the same time I have a lot of time to myself at home. I feel like I'm constantly cleaning, cooking, washing...ahhhh life as a mother. Beyond that I have accomplished a few household projects... staining and building a shelf to hang up a 6 foot piece of glass artwork... I stained my bedside table from an unfinished beech wood to a beautiful cherry mahogany.. 

been hanging out when I can... I am so grateful for these times I have been having, creating closer friendships... I am so blessed with the amazing people in my life..

My trip to California way back when..was JUST what I needed..I spent so much quality time with old friends and got spend time with my family..lotsa of sunshine, the best trip to Disneyland EVER..and a day of sailing.. absolute bliss.. so much has time passed so quickly it already seems like forever ago..

Anastasia is her usual amazing self.. I'm a lucky mommy.

My heart has been mended with plastic surgery stitches.. that's means minimal scarring..I feel strong and have been LOVING all of this time I have had for me.  While I am not sure what the future has in store for me...I don't know.. maybe I am ready to explore my heart's possibilities???? 

maybe.

can't.sit.still.

i am leaving for So Cal in 4 hours. 

Going home always gives me a certain amount of anxiety, but today.. I am a wreck. I had to leave work early cause I felt nervous/nausea.

I need a valium.

It's not that I think the trip is going to suck, I think I am going to have a great time.. but still..this is excessive...

anywhoo.. hopefully I have a great story to tell when i get back..

xoxo

in the meantime

I'm learning my new life.
Creating endless projects to keep myself busy.
I have list of home furnishing I need to buy(new bed set, rice cooker, buffet table).. and some i just plain want (fancy cookware, high thread count sheets, extra fluffy pillowtop for the mattress i need to buy).
I take several cooking classes through out the year. I have recipe packets everywhere. I have decided to transpose all the recipes on to recipe cards and keep them all in a recipe box.
I have been spending lots of time with Anastasia trying to keep her mind off things and keep her positive. dreaming up new things to do with her.
I want to cook more, be more organized, have more fun, be a better friend, and to love myself more.

currently

as you go
part of me wants to scream
"no, don't leave"
and yet
there is still another part of me
holding it back.

wow.

nothing like getting broke up via text message. go me.

SO Cute.

Catching Asia dancing crazy in her room to the Rhianna c.d.

I love her.

when lame situations ruin good pictures

I have like half a dozen pictures I want to delete of my myspace.
why?
Cause I have several group pictures with a person in them I am no longer friends with. But I am still friends with all the rest of the people in the picture. I love the pictures and everyone else in them but it annoys me when I have to see the pictures cause I used to think it was so great.